Saturday, June 5, 2010

Step by Step

During this process it has come to my attention that I am severely damaged. I have absorbed years of pain and emotional trauma meanwhile keeping my own stuff at the very bottom of my soul. I have crashed into the wall at 100 mph with no helmet on and am now trying to pick up the pieces. I have found that part of me can't. Is physically unable to help myself bring me to where I need to be to repair the relationship. What can I do? What's the next step?

Where do I go from here? Do I move on? Do I stay and wait for it to eventually happen again to me? Maybe this time it will take longer and it will go unnoticed for a much longer period of time. But am I willing to wait around for it? The inevitable.

I remember a time when I was super happy. When I was really comfortable with myself. Part of me isn't there anymore it's been sucked into a black hole. It's weird how life turns out. Like you never expected. Sometimes it's a real shocker and other times it's exactly what you wanted.

How do I get myself back to point of trying, trying to piece all this back together and make it happy again? Or is it too late.

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